The thing about chili...

..is that its good. Especially on days that are sorta cold and cloudy. It is also best shared with friends. I have always enjoyed cooking for friends. There is some amount of excitment and anxiety when creating a meal for others...others being non-relatives. Knocking on wood, I don't think I have ever served a meal that was...un-edible? lol I kind of want to keep it that way too. Today I made chili for some friends, and possibly enough for the rest of my family for tomorrow. Each time I make it, I make it a bit differently. It all depends on my mood and what I want the chili to look like. lol Yes, aestetics count. One can't always follow a reciepe, and for chili I rarely do. Thankfully, people can eat it still. lol

Between working, watching KU lose, naping and my friends, I almost didn't write the daily poem. I did however, and geeze if I don't think it sounds somewhat corny. But eh, that was what the point of this goal was anyway, to learn from what I have done. :)

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Friends and food and laughter
The joys of being with those we enjoy
The coming together and sharing
The surprising of others with favorite goodies
Can not be compaired to anything in the world
Being accepted by our friends
Brings happiness
And feelings to be repeated.

The goals are the beginning

Years ago I started a blog, and then for reasons unknow, I stopped. Open, public honesty sometimes can make a person stop being so honest. Blogs have that tendency to make you rethink everything. To take stock of what you are feeling and then that nervousness of knowing others will soon know what you are feeling too. Of course, in that, there is a freedom in sharing. For that reason, I am moving past my semi-private blog that I have on another website, and going public again. This was one of my goals for 2009. Not resolution. Goal.


So today I created it. I flipped on what the content would be more than once, but see no reason at the present to create two more blogs. So this will vary between the randomness and "I can't make this sh*t up" of my life and my writing.


I sat down on Sunday and made a list of goals for this year. 2008 was not a pleasant year for me for many reasons, so my desire to make it better is assured. These are things to make my life better. To help me find my center. To help me move past the bad. To try something new. lol And to stop procrastinating.


The best goal I have is "enjoy life!" I totally plan to do that..if only I won't stop myself first!

Creative time:

Like an unwelcome friend
It comes to me again and again.
Just when I believe it's been shaken
There it is, to cloud and muggle up my day
Confusion perches to the outside
Accepting any way into my life
Not allowing me the peace I so desire
And deserve.

Understanding and admitting aren't always the same

Understanding and admitting doesn't mean acceptance

Understanding why someone is how are they are

Makes that reality no different

Admitting to yourself what you feel and what you need to do

Makes the act no easier to complete

Acceptance can be the cruelest and longest road

A soul has to travel

And it can only be travled alone.

"Just enjoy the tea!" She screamed in her head

As the thoughts of the day swirled and settled

In her mind like the leaves in the hot liquid

The soothing liquie hitting her lips only brought

More jumbled thoughts and regrets

She longed for her mind to be silent and empty

Like the cup before her