I don't do it...

I don't do it all that often, but sometimes I pull the girl card, and I hold it there and don't let go. By girl card I also mean 'old fashioned' or what not. I do this a lot in regards to relationships, and honestly, I try every now and then to change this, but either by results or lack of, I just go back to the 'old way'.

What does that mean? It means I have big issues being the asker-outer. I can hint really well I think, but the vocalization, at least the first time, not so much. That girl card I can put to the side sometimes though. This other one, not so sure. I've only been able to do that once really. I can't make the first move with someone. No matter how much I may want to kiss someone, I don't. I can't make that first move. Going in for a hug is about the extent I can go, and even then I hold back sometimes. I know, its something I should get over and God only knows if I didn't have this 'debilitating' mentality, who knows where I would be or who I would be with. My not trying to kiss you in no way means I am not interested. Me not putting my hand on your leg does not mean that ever fiber of my being isn't wanting to do so. I just don't. I don't make the first move. Its not something that I bring up, so no one is going to know. Its weird. Its me. And although lately this bothers me, there is not much I can do about it.

I'm sure we all have that one thing that we won't do, that anyone else would find silly. These are just mine. These are my girly cards.